Veterinarians have hard jobs. They have high rates of suicide. The shitty behavior of so many human clients takes a toll on their mental health.
I know all this.
And that is why I sent this letter to the administrative team of the veterinary Specialty clinic — because I wanted to offer a counter balance to the awful. I included a copy of the letter in the thank you cards I gave to two of the veterinarians. I told one of them to make sure and share the letter with her parents, and thank them for raising such a good human. I also brought bagels.
You can never say “thank you” enough.
I hope reading this will inspire you to take the time to send gratitude to your veterinary team.
Also, I really miss my sweet girls 💔💔
“Dear Administrative Team:
The purpose of this letter is to share my recent experiences at WestVet Boise and specifically, with Drs. Walters, Leonard, Arndt, and Bayles. Yes, records will show that I have been a frequent flyer at WestVet Boise over the past few months and it is that depth of experience that informs this letter.
I moved to Boise last fall from Montana, but I did not leave my dogs’ longtime veterinarian, Dr. Shoni Card. Since I work remotely for the University of Montana and need to be on campus 2 – 3 times each semester, it works for me to have Dr. Card remain as a member of our veterinary team. This reality is relevant to the care I received at WestVet.
My 11+ year old Bernese Mountain Dog, Sparkle, was initially diagnosed with a ruptured CCL. As her symptoms progressed, it became clear that it was something else and we presented at WestVet through emergency.
Sparkle had a work-up through Dr. Leonard. My favorite part of that whole experience was when Dr. Leonard shared that she and the radiologist had looked at Sparkle’s images and did not agree about what was going on. I am completely serious – I was so impressed and grateful because that kind of transparency and collaboration facilitates excellent care and engenders trust.
Sparkle had a CT with biopsies and was diagnosed with osteosarcoma. Through it all, Dr. Leonard was kind, collaborative, personable, and knowledgeable. I asked that samples be sent to a different lab than WestVet typically uses – that was no problem at all. My dog received excellent care from Dr. Leonard and her team, and so did I.
The diagnosis sent us to Dr. Walters – or as I think of her, Dr. Sparkles, for her sparkling Dansko clogs. When an oncologist walks into an appointment with a dog named Sparkle wearing sparkling clogs you cannot help but to think the Universe has sent the right person at the right time for your beloved dog. That is what I thought, and I was right.
But in the middle of all that with Sparkle, my 13+ year old Berner, Harper, bloated one evening. I recognized the symptoms immediately and raced to WestVet; this was my first interaction with Dr. Bayles.
Harper was immediately taken to the back while I waited in a treatment room. It was not a surprise when Dr. Bayles came in and told me what was going on, and that Harper had also experienced torsion.
Dr. Bayles sat patiently with me while I called Dr. Card at her home in Montana. I explained what was happening and Dr. Bayles joined the conversation. I knew my options and knew I was the one who had to decide but I also know health care is best done with a team, and that is what happened that night. Dr. Card, who knows me and my dogs well, and Dr. Bayles, someone I had just met, let me talk through the hard decision. They provided appropriate and valuable input and support as I made the difficult decision not to put such an elderly dog through a surgery with a poor prognosis; Harper was euthanized that night.
I quite literally teach a class at the University of Montana titled, “Loss, Grief, Dying, and Death” multiple times each year. My professional experience also includes being part of a team that started a pediatric palliative care service, and I developed and implemented the bereavement program for the same large, regional children’s hospital. I have combined my professional expertise and my understanding of the human-animal bond in multiple book chapters, including one titled, “Final gifts. Lessons children can learn from dogs about end-of-life, loss, and grief.”
I mention all this so that you have context – I am informed and experienced in end-of-life care for people and animals. Dr. Bayles was a textbook example of how to do it well. I have thought a lot about this since Harper died because I knew I wanted to write this letter; what I did not know when I started formulating my thoughts was that Dr. Bayles would also be important in Sparkle’s ending.
Dr. Card did the amputation of Sparkle’s leg in Montana and Dr. Walters handled the aftercare. Dr. Walters (aka Dr. Sparkles) is knowledgeable, collaborative, and flexible. She is also an excellent communicator, responsive and thorough via email. I trusted Dr. Walters and the information she shared with me, and maybe most telling to anyone who knows me – I trusted her with my dog, leaving Sparkle with Dr. Walters on multiple Tuesdays when I was teaching a class at Boise State.
Sparkle was also a patient of Dr. Arndt because of arrythmias that developed following the amputation. He is another excellent communicator of complicated information, and clearly so skilled and knowledgeable in his field. I appreciated his understanding that my treatment goals for Sparkle were palliative, and he worked with Dr. Walters in a collaborative way that helped me balanced that difficult benefit/burden equation for Sparkle.
Sparkle received excellent collaborative care because of the professionals involved, and I am so grateful for their willingness to work together on behalf of my dog. Additionally, I want to express my gratitude and respect for their understanding that Dr. Card remained an important member of Sparkle’s team, and for their recognition that I was the throughline for Sparkle’s care. WestVet did client-centered, collaborative care for Sparkle exceptionally well, and for that I am so grateful to everyone involved.
Sadly, Sparkle did not get the time we all hoped and once again, I found myself in WestVet’s little room where I am sure one million tears have been shed. Dr. Bayles was there that day, and truly – that seemed like such a gift. Sparkle left the earth skillfully and peacefully, wrapped in love and kindness.
I did not expect to have two examples from which to draw upon as I share with you what Dr. Bayles did so well, but life – and death – do not usually go according to plan. I know from teaching university students how to interact effectively with hurting humans that some have natural gifts in that regard; Dr. Bayles is such a person.
Dr. Bayles easily and naturally reflects what we call the core conditions: warmth, genuineness, and empathy. These qualities are essential in successful relationships with other humans, and in a crisis, there is not time to get it wrong. Dr. Bayles’s strong relational skills and abilities, which are most certainly inherent in who she is as a human being, have clearly been enhanced through excellent education and training. She is confident without ego, collaborative, curious, compassionate, and an excellent communicator. These are amazing qualities in a professional so early in her career.
I was also struck by Dr. Bayles’s patience as I sorted through options and complicated feelings when Harper needed to leave. Her willingness to engage with a senior veterinarian from Montana that night when Harper bloated reflected both humility and a collaborative spirit that will allow Dr. Bayles to achieve great things in her career; it is those students and early career professionals that think they have all the answers I most worry about (and do not trust!).
Dr. Bayles listened while I told her about my special girls. She validated in appropriate ways, did not offer platitudes, stayed at my pace in the process, and in all ways handled my grief as if she had taken my university course in the subject! I seriously do not have enough words to tell you how impressed I am with Dr. Bayles and how grateful I am to her for allowing my beloved girls to leave in the way they both deserved.
When Harper died, I received inappropriate emails from the cremation company – Dr. Bayles made sure that did not happen when Sparkle died. I so appreciate her advocacy on my behalf; those emails were unfortunate.
I would be remiss if I did not also mention the technicians whose kindness and skill were also so apparent. Unfortunately, I do not have names (except Shannon) but the oncology tech who was also working when Sparkle died was wonderful, and Dr. Leonard’s tech was also noteworthy.
WestVet Boise has put together an exceptional team and I now know this very well. Thank you for being a community asset for those of us who value excellence, and who are committed to providing quality care for our animals throughout their lives. If there is any way I can give back to WestVet Boise, please do not hesitate to ask.”