Kaibab Bernese Mountain Dogs

Being a breeder who cares is such a fine line to walk — like being a mother-in-law or a grandparent. Even when you see or know things you consider cringeworthy, you have to preserve the relationship at all costs.

All costs.

As a breeder, I know about those costs: Anxiety, worry, regret, soul searching, and lost sleep.

As I look at potential puppy homes, I am keenly alert for red flags that suggest I might be paying future high costs for a placement. This is what careful and caring breeders do — it is not unique to me.

A red flag for a puppy mill or backyard breeder might be concerns about whether someone can pay — for me, red flags are all about incongruence with what I consider an optimal life for a puppy.

“Who the heck gets to decide whether my home is optimal for a puppy?” one might indignantly ask.

Fair question and here is the answer as it relates to the Bright Stars and Moonshadows: Me.

I created these lives. Of course I am the one who must decide what is optimal.

There are so many variations of optimal, and this is wonderful because puppies are individuals who need different kinds of homes.

But what all puppies need — in my definition of optimal — is to be a priority. A high priority. One worth time, attention, adaptation, and yes — sacrifices.

This is tough. People want a puppy. I want to sleep at night. And the truth is that sometimes those two things cannot both happen; that reality doesn’t make anyone a bad person.

This is a busy week. We will be doing formal evaluations of the puppies. The Bright Stars will have veterinary exams, get microchipped, have blood drawn both for titers and Berner-Garde sponsored research, and based on titer results, may get their first vaccination. In addition, Claire’s surgery is tomorrow.

And so all things considered — the 10+10+9+me of us are doing some variation of fine. In my case, it looks like more like an acronym (F.I.N.E.) but never mind that — we knew it would be March Madness, right?

If someone were to tell you “NO!” right at this minute, would you understand which of the many things you were saying, doing, and/or thinking was the target of the cease and desist message?

Likely not.

Instead, you would probably freeze on multiple levels and not know what to do next.

Welcome to the life of most puppies (and too many children).

If a human said NO! at that moment: Should the puppy stop biting a sibling? Stop biting the tunnel? Stop having fun? Sit instead of down? Get out of the tunnel? Get off the Cato Board? And so on…

“No!” — an error message — is like a shotgun blast. Good luck just hitting the little target with that. Collateral damage is assured.

Error messages are frustrating for all concerned. They are confusing, ineffective, and most of all — they do not help the puppy (or human) understand what to do instead.

Our goal is to shape desired behavior — that does not happen when we simply stop undesired behavior. We need to lose the word “NO” and get to “Yes.” This requires that we pay attention to what is going well and consistently reinforce it.

Undesired behavior needs to be thought of as a television channel — if you do not like what is playing, change the flipping channel — don’t just yell at the television.

We change the channel with a puppy using redirection and distraction, and teaching/reinforcing an incompatible behavior.

Let me give an example: Puppy jumping up.

Puppies are so happy to see us and want to be closer to our faces — so they jump up. Normal. Expected. And maybe best not to reinforce because it won’t be safe when the puppy is big.

What happens when one says “NO!” to puppy jumping up?

First, my puppies are smart and talented but I do not teach them English and so you might as well yell “PANCAKE” for all the effect it will have.

Second, even if your word is loud enough to scare the puppy (#mean) off your new pants (and WHY were you wearing nice pants around a puppy?!), which of the things the puppy was doing at that moment did you want to stop? Being happy to see you?! #fail

The solution is easy peasy. Do not give the puppy a chance to jump up — instead, always be ready to help the puppy greet you with a sit. I will do a video later this week — it is not hard at all. And when you are not paying attention and the puppy does jump up, just ignore her until she is four-feet-on-the-floor — and then reinforce that behavior.