Real

I caught up with a colleague yesterday over an outdoor lunch. She asked about the dogs and this resulted in me telling her about the 10 + 10 — and breaking out into both a cold sweat and hives (slightly kidding) as I recounted the adventure.

She was incredulous.

Zuber Heze (Bright Star)

So am I.

Still.

For those who might have missed that chapter, I bred two of my girls at the same time. Why? Because one had not gotten pregnant twice before in spite of well-aligned stars — I had resigned myself she was not fertile. Apparently, she was just waiting for Mr. Right.

Both girls got pregnant and each delivered ten puppies — one week apart.

Shhh. We do not say “twenty”! We do not even spell it out. You may whisper it if you must…

…but 10 + 10 sounds more civilized.

10 + 10 is also the amount of pounds I lost during those weeks. The whole experience was brutal. Not a diet I recommend.

Baby Claire!

I suppose if one runs a kennel and puppy management consists of checking in and changing sawdust a couple of times a day, 10 + 10 puppies would be easy — our puppies are not raised like that. Not at all.

There are two things I did not tell my colleague because they are still such a struggle…

…but the conversation with her brought those things front and center in my mind this morning.

There IS a Sparkle picture for all occasions!

The first one is the terrifying vulnerability that is represented by all those puppies — especially ones in new homes. I am trusting all those new homes to do the right things — the things they agreed to do — and that is scary leap of faith for me.

Moonshadows

Obviously I think well of the new homes or they would not have a puppy. That doesn’t change the reality that 10 + 10 = Extreme Emotional Exposure.

During a scary pandemic and etc.

I am grateful when I get updates both because I love hearing about each and every puppy (from every litter ever) and because those updates/photos provide appreciated reassurance that everything is okay.

The second thing that remains absolutely heartbreakingly hard with the 10 + 10 was the loss of a friendship. I am not sure how long it will take to get over all that continues to mean to me.

There is sometimes so much going on behind the scenes in the lives of others — things we cannot know and that would inspire any of us to offer grace and comfort and support (aka Little Soldiers). We wish and hope that others will understand that and behave accordingly but sometimes they just can’t.

Maybe it is worse for them, however unimaginable that might seem to us when we are trying to manage our own overwrought lives.

But the inability of others to respond with compassion and grace in the face of our fragility should never cause us to react in a like manner. How we treat others is about who we are — not who they are, in that moment.

Bright Stars

I am glad I was able to tell my colleague yesterday that — yes — every puppy in the 10 + 10 survived, and that each is in an amazingly wonderful home. I could not be more grateful for my Bright Star or for the chance I had to give Toby back a piece of Holden from the Moonshadow litter.

Moonshadows

But all of that joy still co-exists with a complex set of emotions and experiences that are hard to describe — here it is months and months later, and I am still processing it all.

With impeccable timing, I just got this message…

Thank you, Dear Friend, for the article but even more — for the precious gifts of empathy, understanding, and yes — the exact right amount of humor.

I love humans. Sure — it is messy and hard, but we just keep at it because inside, we are all gems.

Keep polishing, friends — and keep polishing friends.

A Challenge in the Nicest Way

I look at this photo and am reminded that small, caring gestures are powerful contributors to the happiness of others.

While I am not suggesting we go out and lick people, it does seem like maybe today is an especially good day for random acts of kindness and caring.

Ready, Set, GO.

Misadventures

Jennifer was out of town and Alex sent her a text to please call him ASAP — here is the story in her words:

“I call, thinking something horrible happened and he’s said what I thought was “Lupine ate a quaalude!”

Does she looked stoned?!

My first thought was where in the h#$$ would she get a quaalude?! And OH NO!

And then he clearly said she ate a quail! She chased and caught a quail and ate the entire thing in essentially one bite! He wanted to know what to do about it. I said, ummm, don’t give her any dinner and send her back to Mary-Ann!”

I laughed so hard when I got that email. Obviously they won’t really send Lupine back to me — in addition to her skills in hunting, she is also a Master Gardener!

Rosebud generated a bit of humor recently as well.

Now almost a year old, it was time for her to be spayed and because we love efficiency, Harper had a foot lump removed on the same day. I picked them both up and OF COURSE each was safely confined as I drove home — until Rosebud wasn’t.

Suddenly I had a cat on my lap and on the dash and you get the idea.

I was stopping at Suzanne’s anyway and that seemed a safer place to deal with wandering Rosebud than the side of the highway and so I kept driving. I arrived at Suzanne’s and she met me at her gate — I was delivering Scentwork supplies.

With Rosebud wandering, I could not just roll down the window so I got out and left the car running with the a/c on. Rosebud watched us from the dash — until she decided to explore the car a bit.

Suzanne and I heard a “click” and looked at the van — and each other.

There is a Sparkle sign for all occasions!

Yep — Rosebud had stepped on the door lock. I was locked out of the van.

This probably tells you a lot about my life these days — I thought this was the funniest thing ever. Locked out of my van by my cat!? Hilarious.

Suzanne was more practical.

Extra key? Nope.

Dear Husband? Nope.

We settled on calling AAA and Suzanne went in to get her phone.

While she did that, Rosebud wandered more and managed to roll down a back window a bit by stepping on yet another electronic thingee.

Never mind the phone — Suzanne went back to her house to get something long and stick-like. We got the car unlocked, shoved Rosebud in with Harper, and there you go — yet another reason all animals should be safely secured in vehicles.

You can learn a lot — from a cat?! Apparently so.